Parenting Principles

Becoming a mother has to be one of the hardest and most challenging events that has occurred in my life. But along with being difficult at times, it has also been one of the richest and happiest times that  I have ever experienced. Of course I love my children completely, the tricky part is figuring out the best way to teach and enforce rules-- how to love and discipline at the same time.

I've often wondered why there isn't a handbook that tells you exactly how to be a parent. There are plenty of books out there that try to share information that will be beneficial in parenting, however, each family and child brings unique combinations that cannot be explained fully in any parenting manual. I've learned about the most effective parenting techniques in other courses that I have taken, but the ideal and what occurs in real life don't always match up. I want to be that ideal model ALL of the time, it just isn't how I react in those intense moments when something has been broken and there is teasing and fighting going on. I really do wish in those moments that I could take myself out of the picture and have a "professional" take over. Solve the problem, clean up the mess, send the children outside to play and then I would magically reappear. Almost like having a Mary Poppins to take care of those heated instances and the problem would be solved. So now that I have again read about the most effective parenting techniques, I need to work on the application. I know how important and sacred my responsibilities are as a parent, as a mother, in the lives of my children. President Ezra Taft Benson (1974, p. 381) said:

"Usually the Lord gives us the overall objectives to be accomplished and some guidelines to follow, but he expects us to work out most of the details and methods. The methods and procedures are usually developed through study and prayer and by living so that we can obtain and follow the promptings of the Spirit."

The Proclamation to the Family has this to say about parenting:

“God’s commandment for His children to multiply and replenish the earth remains in force.”

“Husband and wife have a solemn responsibility to love and care for…their children.”

“Husbands and wives—mothers and fathers—will be held accountable before God for the discharge of these obligations.”

Sounds pretty serious, right? YES it is. But that makes it that much more vital for us to put forth our best efforts in our roles as parents. For me it is knowing how to act, instead of simply reacting. As a mother- I've learned more about the special role I have. It is more than I had originally thought through in my mind. Having more to read and ponder has helped me to appreciate my life right now, as I teach and help my children to learn and to grow into responsible, capable, and happy people. I really have had moments to think about my own experiences as well as the examples from my own parents. I was able to have an interview with my mother and talk to her about her goals as a parent with her young family. Her objectives are also what I want for my family. I want my children to have testimonies of the gospel, faith in the Savior and Heavenly Father's plan, to be honorable, successful, and happy.